I’ll Bring the Chocolate – The Making of More Than an Event!
Ah, the power of chocolate! It’s absolutely magical for soothing the soul and satisfying the palette. It’s rich, stimulating, soothing, and delicious. It is that sweet “something extra” that infuses anything ordinary with delectable flavor and zest. In the same way, loving friendships can sweeten a woman’s life and make almost any situation – good or bad – taste even better. The I’ll Bring the Chocolate annual event was inspired from this concept. It’s our annual affair which gives women an opportunity as well as a space to come together to network, support and potentially befriend each other, while dressing up and having a great time. It’s a wake-up call for every woman who’s forgotten the sweetness and strength found in deep friendships with other women. Please check-out more photos from last year’s event now posted on our blog www.andbutterfliestoo.com/photos-from-ill-bring-the-chocolate-mimosas-and-sisterhood-luncheon/
In rolling out this year’s women’s event, each month leading up to the July affair, we will be featuring on our blog just a few of the many amazing professional women whom I admire. Many of them I know on a personal level, others are women I admire from afar but they were kind enough to grant us the opportunity to highlight them as well. I hope you are inspired as much as we are by their beauty, tenacity, creativity, and wisdom!
Admittedly, for a long time I had not felt this deep connection or commitment to sisterhood. Chocolate was just something I indulged in and learned to properly temper in culinary school. Until recently, I have never been a part of an exclusive, core friend group. You know the ones I’m talking about – the posse, my girls, the team, etc. The ride or dies that are always with each other, and something is definitely wrong if they aren’t. In fact, it was only within the last five years that I was totally content in maintaining one female friendship at a time. The kind of friend that not only knows where the bodies are buried but one who will bring her own shovel and won’t ask any questions. I would not be who I am without them! Thank you Doris, Lavena, Amina, Kim, and Deidre! Although many would agree that it’s a good thing because it’s all about quality over quantity. For me it was about avoidance and staying within my comfort zone. Two areas I’ve been determined to work through in my life.
Often scarred by girl bullies at school, lonely isolation in my teenage years, and mean girls in the workplace, I was either too scared to make female friends or believed having girlfriends was too risky to my emotional health. Being an introvert as well as a highly sensitive person only intensified those feelings and experiences. Concluding at an early age that “all women were untrustworthy” kept me safe initially, but as the years went on it affected my ability to form bonds with new women – even those who were kind and trustworthy. It was just easier to maintain one female friendship at a time. That I could handle. However, the phobia of befriending more than one female friend caused me to feel lonely, isolated, and cut off from the potential of real meaningful sisterhood.
If we’re fortunate, most of us grow wiser as we grow older – and as God would have it I did. Somewhere during my journey I grew wiser about life which included the importance of conquering my fears and seeking out healthy relationships with women and even how to handle bullies; but taking it to mean girls is another story for another time. I realized I had missed out on the sweet richness and strength found in deep bonds with other women. My soul longed for the experiences played out in the movie “Waiting to Exhale.” Remember that movie with Angela Bassett, Loretta Devine, Whitney Houston, and Lela Rochon? It was about a group of women who in the midst of life’s challenges– divorce, infidelity, teenagers, dating, money troubles, loneliness and more – who came together as friends and supported each other. It represents sisterhood at its very best.
I’m still working through a lot of my bad experiences with female friendships, run-ins with mean girls, and the impact of being introverted (we hate small talk). I’m working towards having my own real life scene that summarizes the friendship shared by those women more than Gloria’s birthday party in the final scene. My experiences left me wanting to strengthen sisterhood in the world, to let all women know that divided we are fragmented bits of light – random and small – but united we create the prism through which creativity, love, beauty, and dreams are projected on the world. We need each other, especially now, and the entire planet benefits when we feel safe, supported, and empowered. I’ll Bring the Chocolate affairs was created solely for this purpose!
Happy creating Butterflies – don’t forget to be your best self!